A Prodigal Princess is a book that was recently released by Pastor Adara Butler. She shares her testimony on how she ran from her calling but ultimately came to Christ and her journey along the way.
As I navigated the pages of the book, I was able to identify with a lot of what Adara shares, because I too, dealt with an identity crisis early in my walk. So much so that I dealt with relationships God never told me to walk into and developed ungodly habits, but through the blood of Jesus, I have accepted forgiveness and learned to move on with my life.
When I came across the following words, it hit my spirit like the first time I realized it for myself:
“…no matter how many people tell you that you are beautiful or special, those are just empty words until you believe who you are.”
For many years of my life, people would say such nice things to me like how beautiful they think I am, or other personal attributes like having a sweet spirit. I would say thank you, without really realizing the words that were being spoken to me.
I can’t remember when that moment of truth was, but at some point I really started to believe for myself that I am beautiful. And that the beauty starts in my heart, not from the outside. I came to understand that people would say I have a sweet spirit because that’s the vibe they got in their interaction with me. I started to believe that I AM a good person. I started to walk in the understanding that my creator knew what He was doing when He chose to put me here, and the best thing I could do is embrace it and walk in it, because running from it was going to cause more harm than good.
Unlike Adara, I didn’t have a two parent home with mom and dad; my parents never married. And now, the only parent that I truly had is with the Lord.
I didn’t make that comment to bash my mother or make her out to be a bad person. She is still in the process of being delivered. My point is that I didn’t have the same foundation. The dynamic of my family life was dysfunctional and unstable. But even with the stability of a great foundation, Adara and I both battled similar issues. One of which was the fact that we both had an identity crisis.
Some people have the idea that in order to go through such things, you had to have a certain background or circumstances. This couldn’t be further from the truth. The enemy can attack anyone who has a purpose and a calling on their life, no matter who you are or where you’re from. God can choose whomever he’d like. It doesn’t have anything to do with your upbringing.
But God led me to take it a step further as those words resonated with me. I realized that the concept of what you believe about yourself applies to anything that is being said to you. Until you believe something for yourself, you will not experience the full realm of the manifestation of that thing.
Until I believed that I was a manager on my job, on the very basic and foundational level, I couldn’t really operate as a manager. I couldn’t see past being a peer to my employees.
Until I believed that I was creative, I didn’t understand the gift that God had deposited in me. I have since discovered that I love to play with colors. From painting to interior decorating to thrift shopping, I have discovered something so great about myself and I have learned to embrace it.
Until I believed that God had a plan for my life, I was afraid to walk away from things that He never told me to pick up. As hard as it was to let go after all of the logic I kept trying to convince myself of, I had to come to understand that it was supernatural, and that my logic paled in comparison to what God was trying to show me. God had greater works he wanted to do through me and I had to let go of what I thought was best and embrace what God was showing me.
On the flip side, the reverse is true. you choose what you receive regarding what others speak to you.
I have had this conversation with my daughter: People can say whatever they want to you, but it is ultimately your choice whether you believe or receive the things that are spoken to you. I have bound and rebuked things spoken to me that I don’t receive or believe about myself. Note that there is a difference between accepting constructive criticism and receiving or believing flat out negativity about yourself. For example, it’s one thing for me to be told that my demeanor makes me unapproachable. It is another thing to be told that I’m a mean person because my demeanor isn’t received well. I can learn how to have a more positive demeanor, but lack of a positive demeanor doesn’t mean that I have an intention to be mean to anyone.
I am not even halfway through Adara’s book, and I’m receiving so much fresh revelation. I can hardly wait to see what other evoking thoughts will come of this. I highly recommend this book. You can order the digital version here, or the paperback version here.
I pray that these words have been a blessing to you.